Some people have a problem with things that go through others's minds.
Also, some people act, basically, what you dub "overly possessive." It's not too bad, but, sometimes, things happen.
Now, why am I up late feeling startled? I had such a good dream, last night.. Oh well, I hope I sleep well. I slept pretty early, last night, 5:00 P.M. I slept that early, the past few nights, as well.
Also, I see ... jokes? on me for things I supposedly revel in, which I don't actually in the way you'd think. I thought you could chose what you participate in. I know most people get on with me pretty readily, in certain kinds of situations. I'm not sure about when I see other people who seem to know a lot about me.
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Fixing the Past
Everything always matters, in a way. True, later, you can compensate with reasons to make things seem okay, but that doesn't really patch it up, in reality, and burdens you.
Done With
Some people just keep thinking something was settled in the past that you were wrong, but I just explained how that happened. Even if they agree you're right at one point, they forget it, when convenient.
Allowed to Happen
People are willing to put me through unpleasant situations, in order to prove a point. I guess this is allowed to happen at more than one kind of an expense.
Substituting Reality
I just figured out something important. I always do the right thing, technically. (If I mess up, there's a reason..) People have all skirted by me, pushing aside opposing crowds, at alternating times working, working where "popular," by virtually saying *it seemed like it at the moment* or *it seemed like it was right at the moment*. So, if people prove they convinced you at a moment, borrowing from what I'm used to, it means they're right, to them. I guess you could use this to achieve certain ends and convince others that they're right. What happened was people made assumptions to convince you of something, that you're not perfect, that you could have done something differently. People find something you did wrong and convince others you're always "wrong" in another way.
"The Ellen DeGeneres Show"
I hope to watch it, but, it seems, I spend so much time in bed and, the remainder, posting on the internet.. ^66^
I guess I submit myself to, like, solitary confinement. I also have to fit in jogging. I also get ready and post pictures of videos of me on the internet. I try to do it daily.
Then, I'm trying to do art, too. There's also my singing.
My dad said I could get something, for $10, to record shows on, in my room, so I could watch it, in private, anytime I want. I'll ask him for that, and I hope I get it. He'll have to, hopefully, get it next week.
So, I hope I watch this show! :) There's a lot of promise that I will.
I guess I submit myself to, like, solitary confinement. I also have to fit in jogging. I also get ready and post pictures of videos of me on the internet. I try to do it daily.
Then, I'm trying to do art, too. There's also my singing.
My dad said I could get something, for $10, to record shows on, in my room, so I could watch it, in private, anytime I want. I'll ask him for that, and I hope I get it. He'll have to, hopefully, get it next week.
So, I hope I watch this show! :) There's a lot of promise that I will.
Dream
I was revisiting a little room with hidden away areas where 1-year-olds were staying, at a nursery ... and I was going to teach art and music there. I think I had some colorful things and an easel with paint on it. I think I played church music and maybe children's music, 2 things, on a keyboard, and employed little musical gadgets, vaguely ... So, I had a memory of having been there before, hired, I think with another girl in the background. I quit, though, it feeling a farce. It felt like I was making a fool of myself. So, I returned, older, things changed, better, though. However, now, it was just, pleasantly one lady in charge, around age 55 or 60. She was thin, somewhat supple and strong, with short straight course mousy blonde hair, which supposedly seemed natural, to some effect. She probably had glasses on. When I entered, one little munchkin boy, older and chubby, was wiling away or squirming away back to his little cubby hole somewhere and disappeared. So, I was there, for awhile. It turned into a place to try on long, thick-materialed dresses, with long sleeves, 2 of them ... I know one had flowers. They were 2-piece, I think with the top tucked in, maybe on one. One had flowers in soft dim colors. I also got a red knee-length dress with long sleeves. It has a vibe of Chinese vaguely, maybe with a criss cross layer at the top corner with buttons. So, I was to try on the clothes but never did.
I woke up about 3 times tonight, with Radio Swiss Classic on on iTunes. Usually, after every song, a girl comes on, and, then, a guy announces the next song.
The next dream, I got off at like a city-large or possibly larger feel equivalent to but more like a shopping center college campus that was really high school or college with some girls in the last major area I lived with my family. The bus ride was supposedly rather long. I walked with them, and we got along, better, for some reason. I never got to a class, like a dream fuels you, usually. I was kinda off alone, too. I was probably wearing something more proper. The lady in charge of the nursery was there at the door getting off the bus, at which I faltered, turning the other way, at first, and then like hopped down the huge drop to the floor. There were different paths and like by a street where I walked, a long time, scenery supplied, here and there, pretty well. There was one point, when a friend put her finger through something sharp. She asked me if they were sharp. They slid and curved one direction and maybe were as sharp as a pencil. She slid her finger through, maybe 1|2 inch. She had a thing like a watering can with a long hose nose, and blood came out of it, so I told her. It was actually coming out of her finger, next. This was a girl I knew I would see somewhere else that I saw her, like at school or church or something like that. I think my dream ended, then.
The nostalgia I take away is the pleasantness, pastel-y shadowy quality of the nursery at the church, church|school. Also, it was wicked, the demented quality of the school.
It just gave me a feeling of being grown-up, yet young.
It made me think of that place I used to live. I supposedly missed it and should go back, but I thought and decided where I live is more special. I thought of the place before that and am over it, like it's a tied up case, important or meaningful, though, it is.
This is the first dream in a while where I felt so mature yet spritely, fresh. It seems Radio Swiss Classic helped mold and solidify these thoughts. I got such a different feeling from the German and French radio.
It left me feeling refreshed and like I'm finally worth something, in a different way. It sorta blended, though, like I wasn't expecting it.
Also, let me add, that I slept from about 5:00 P.M. until about 3:45 A.M.
I woke up about 3 times tonight, with Radio Swiss Classic on on iTunes. Usually, after every song, a girl comes on, and, then, a guy announces the next song.
The next dream, I got off at like a city-large or possibly larger feel equivalent to but more like a shopping center college campus that was really high school or college with some girls in the last major area I lived with my family. The bus ride was supposedly rather long. I walked with them, and we got along, better, for some reason. I never got to a class, like a dream fuels you, usually. I was kinda off alone, too. I was probably wearing something more proper. The lady in charge of the nursery was there at the door getting off the bus, at which I faltered, turning the other way, at first, and then like hopped down the huge drop to the floor. There were different paths and like by a street where I walked, a long time, scenery supplied, here and there, pretty well. There was one point, when a friend put her finger through something sharp. She asked me if they were sharp. They slid and curved one direction and maybe were as sharp as a pencil. She slid her finger through, maybe 1|2 inch. She had a thing like a watering can with a long hose nose, and blood came out of it, so I told her. It was actually coming out of her finger, next. This was a girl I knew I would see somewhere else that I saw her, like at school or church or something like that. I think my dream ended, then.
The nostalgia I take away is the pleasantness, pastel-y shadowy quality of the nursery at the church, church|school. Also, it was wicked, the demented quality of the school.
It just gave me a feeling of being grown-up, yet young.
It made me think of that place I used to live. I supposedly missed it and should go back, but I thought and decided where I live is more special. I thought of the place before that and am over it, like it's a tied up case, important or meaningful, though, it is.
This is the first dream in a while where I felt so mature yet spritely, fresh. It seems Radio Swiss Classic helped mold and solidify these thoughts. I got such a different feeling from the German and French radio.
It left me feeling refreshed and like I'm finally worth something, in a different way. It sorta blended, though, like I wasn't expecting it.
Also, let me add, that I slept from about 5:00 P.M. until about 3:45 A.M.
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