Dream

So, it wasn't tacky like because it was just like I was a little girl, kinda like having an adopted mom.  It was neat, though, I had the composure I had today rather than feeling totally smothered or something.  I tend to reject that or not have had the opportunity as much to feel quite like that, often at least.  I really don't, now.

I was just completely comfortable.

In some ways, you can compensate the idea, though not when concentrating on one side, that it's like give and take, you can be like both, touch someone else or let someone else touch you.

I like that high quality, sorta "neat" quality of being touched and feeling that I assume everyone craves.  However, I feel more like I did what was obviously desired like the people who administer these feelings.  I know that other people are affected by them, even if they're not like them.  It's not limited to race, neither, but it seems that often Caucasians do more of this.

By that quality I mean like it seems sorta pre-planned, kinda like what people in the arts give the vibe of for some reason.  It's interesting, like in gymnastics and such things, you feel different ways, supposedly.  Dunno, though.

Or maybe it's more of that family feel, too, but perhaps more desirable as that publicized or artsy quality, rather, it seems.

But, it was nice, it was just like the person was my mom.  It's interesting how I felt that when I was awake.  It was a literal thought.  It was like that in age and technically.  I've written how you can feel thoughts, like happy or generous thoughts, not as ideas but as the feelings themselves, though these feelings don't last as long as they seem they should.

I assume everyone feels complexly, not sure how physical and like combined as emotional.

Also, I'm having my female thing.  I had a very very little like the other day or so ago, so it's interesting.  I hope it's substantial because since having that pill I don't need (psychiatric pill) I haven't but got off it.  It gave me a tumor under my brain, too.  Yes, it's connected.  It's under a gland under the brain.  They probably won't ever operate because it's so small.  I get one more brain scan.

It's true I've been acting more commanding realizing my kids could get hurt if submissive, and I don't want to like depend on the husband-father.

Yea, my female thing has been pretty light, whereas before it was always very heavy, sometimes not as heavy as usual but not often.

So, anyway, I had a partly nice dream.  :)  It was a big awkward but somehow happened.  :|  Not sure why, but it was nice.  It gives me ideas and makes me feel more calm, at least.  One day, I will get to help people like that in real life.  That's not what you're supposed to be thinking when it's about you because the other person doesn't want to think like that in that situation, themselves.  I don't see how I will do it, one day, exactly, but I guess it's kinda in my will to do it or something.  Depends on if it's invited, too.

Also, I feel different in the situation of my generation as to later ones.  Like, it seems more suggestive in ways, I guess, physically, maybe a good thing.  I forget if I was to say something I haven't in this arena.  I've felt like reflections of how I'd want like my kids to feel, a molding or improvement of how I felt, somehow, interesting to sit and try to imagine.